“If They’re the Flawed Party; Why are You the One Suffering?”

Counseling only effective when the recipient listens

Whether its a business strategist, psychologist or pastoral counselor each would be quick to tell any of us that when things are not flowing in our lives as we think they should, we must first look at ourselves.  They will tell us to ensure that our approaches to differing areas of our lives, from romantic to parental to business relationships are the kinds of approaches that create meaningful, positive results.  While no scenario is perfect, there is much we can contribute to better results.

All this being said, we encounter no shortage of providers of care, often in small, community based settings, who have damaged if not severed relationships with important referral and direct purchase of service agencies.  At the same time the provider accepts little to no responsibility for the strained circumstances.  They may even rant with regularity about how unprofessional that organization might be and how they feel things should have taken place, even with multiple agencies.  What is this provider forgetting?

1.  This organization you are complaining against is likely thriving, creating new mechanisms for financing care and expanding whom they can serve.

2.  This organization you feel lacks professionalism may have outstanding relationships with hundreds of other pro-active providers while you sit on the outside with your criticism.

3.  The one with loss revenue is you.

In any failed relationship there is value in listening to the advice of the Michael Jackson song, “man in the mirror.”  At some point we have to PIC - MAN IN THE MIRROR COVERturn things inward to take a look and see if we:

1.  Failed to adapt to changing circumstances or environments which resulted in our failure as a care provider

2.  Entrusted important responsibilities to those not qualified to pursue our best interests

3.  Allowed greed to determine how we financially structured our care delivery program resulting in staff and resident discontent and ignored appropriate operational protocol.

Of course when that happens we lose the confidence of those who may have previously trusted us to care for those whose care they manage.  To make things right this advice might be worth serious consideration:

1.  Watch your intellectual involvement or association with other care providers who hold daily pity parties that allows them to shift blame from self to others.  Once you buy into this mindset you could be prevented from making any required self-improvements which could put you on a new course to success.

2.  Remember the greedy hog gets the fattest and is often the first one slaughtered.  Amend what you feel you need to take from the business if it means you give the business more time to grow and thrive.  Think of acquiring and maintaining wealth as a long-term strategy and not a “hit and miss” or “grab and run” strategy that can damage you long-term and hurt the ability of the business to prosper from well-paid, happy employees.

If we feel we are having an incredibly hard time accepting the need for change, professional counseling may be in order.  This could help us to manage the anxiety associated with our short-term failure and assist in developing a winner’s mindset with the right ingredients.

Whether your business is adult day care, small-scale assisted living i.e. adult foster care or community residential group homes or home care, you can rebuild after setbacks but it will not occur until we accept responsibility for our contribution to what went wrong. Then we can plot a strategy for moving forward by avoiding the pitfalls of yesteryear.

This is a special event for the progressive Michigan Adult Foster Care provider. Details will be posted at www.directcaretraining.com on November 1, 2014 for attendees and exhibitors.

During next April’s event for Michigan’s adult foster care providers we will discuss in detail how to use specific strategies to abandon the grief of yesterday and plot a course for success now.  Those committed to the rehashing of yesterday’s waste are asked not to register and attend.  Please stay away!  From how to create a paperless environment to making better insurance decisions to how to diversify the services you offer to how to protect yourself from the provider type who can only bring you down, its all covered in this April 22-24, 2015 event.

Life and business comes with ‘ups and downs’ or as former American President Richard Nixon would say, “peaks and valleys”.  Its just harder to crawl out of the valley when we ignore how we got there in the first place.

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